Thursday, April 3, 2008

My Human Hates Me...

Hello again! Today I meet you from my porch, tied up. Seems that I angered my human last night. I just found some sprinklers for the tree and a few select bushes that were surrounded in mud. Apparently, I am not allowed to dig up the bushes...or the tree for that. Also, I guess I have been forbidden from the sprinklers.

My human and I were playing chase...I dug in the mud and she ran after me trying to spank my butt. What she doesn't realize is that butt smacking feels like nothing to me, being that I have a mass amount of fuzz covering it.
So, she pretended to be angry and we had soooo much fun. She ran from one side of the yard, tried to block me, but no! Mr. T-Bone Beasley pulled many quick ones and got by the human! Score one for team Bease!

She finally caught up to me and I was just about to give her a victory mud kiss, but instead she pulled me by my designer harness and hooked me up to to pole outside. I tried and tried and TRIED!!!! But alas, I could not free myself from restriction. So, I got mad at my human, and forbade her from any beauty shots of me and my muddy face!
No! You cannot see all that is Mr. T-Bone Beasley! You make me sad!!!!

The retraints were straining my back!

Fine...I give up, I'll lay down...but I'm still mad at you!

After my muddiness dried up, my human allowed me to enter my own home again...but wait, NOOOOOO! I was airlifted! And moved to the shower!!! NOOOOO!!! Not the hole of watery death!!!!
ACK!!! The water! It is burning the filth off my fur! The dirt is being washed away, I worked so hard to maintain my four legged humanly scent! And now I smell like Lavender and mint! EWWWWWW

Oh, the humanity...

Osama Bin Bease I am...

This is Mr. T-Bone Beasley signing out, reminding you all that if you must play in mud, be sure the humans aren't watching!
Mr. T-Bone Beasley


Faya said...

....Aïe my poor Mr. Beasley....oups... I am so sorry for the shower..... But huuuummmm if you realy smell lavender and mint I wish I can come and give you a lot of kisses.....

Deetz said...

Awe poor Beasley. You will get faster and quicker at getting away from your human as you get older...sometimes its not wise though to run from them, cuz they may be keeping you from danger....When I play in horse poop or mud, I usually run after my mum and jump all over her, thataway she has to take a bath too....
Love you Beasley

Harry said...

You certainly know how to keep your humans on their toes don't you young man?! Awfully sorry to hear about the bath though!

Toodle pip
Harry x

Maggie & Mitch said...

Glad you gave your mom a good chase, Mr. T-Bone Beasley. Too bad about the bath though!
We were digging today but we didn't have muddy circumstances here so we didn't get into too much trouble and NO BATH!!!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Noah the Airedale said...

Oh poor you Beasley. How unfair to wash off all that hard work. We don't think your human really hates you though, probably the opposite lol.

Hugs and tail wags
Noah Willow Tess & Lucy

Chef said...

Oh no. Not lavender. I was at the groomer's this week and I also smell like a girliedog. Poor us, Beasleyboy. Won't our humans ever learn that we want to stink and be filthy?? Anyway, cool plaid stuff. Suits you great.

xoxo Chef

Lorenza said...

Hi, Mr. T!
Sure it was not fun to be tied there!
I love mudd and I love baths!
Kisses and hugs

Molly and Taffy said...

Oh Mr T-Bone Beasley

What a day you had! Hope your Friday is much better! Hoomans certainly have a real hang up about mud don't they!!

Molly and Taffy

Mango said...

Oh man, you have to come to my estate. Momma gave up on trying to keep the house clean a looooong time ago. We have the rain here today and there will be plenty wet Mango prints everywhere!

What's up with the water torture? You need to send that photo to the am less pee international.

Cassidy said...

Hi hi,

Me does obedience classes two times a week - that's what me getted certificates and rosettes for, and me does ringcraft one day a week to practice for entering dog shows. Me be busy girl.

Cassidy x

Deetz said...

Scruffy, Lacy and Babystan are throwing a surprise pawty for Asta, when she returns from Rome....You can go to their blog and get the information. I will be flying aire ruby.

Penny & Poppy said...

T-Bone, you are way too cute to be tied to the post for very long! By the way, even if the hoomans don't see us rolling in mud, they can usually tell anyway! Here in Georgia, we come into the house looking a lot redder than usual!

Poppy & Penny

Stella said...

Hey, T-Bone!

I'm Stanley's sissy, Stella! Word on the street is that you're one of the new dales in town, and I had to come by to say HEYYYY! So, HEYYYY!

BUM-MER about the bath and cruel restraints! I'm a mud lovin' honey pup and love to roll and roll in the mud. Stanley taught me to get on my back in the mud and roach around until I'm all covered. That situation is always closely followed up by the bathing process here in GooberStan. Hoomans don't appreciate that we have our own beauty regimen.

I hope you'll be my bud. Sometimes I need a partner in crime against hairy Stanley!

Gooby love & kissies,
Stella Bean Latifah (but you can call me Stella)